The Militant Libertarian

I'm pissed off and I'm a libertarian. What else you wanna know?

Sunday, March 28, 2004

The Homosexual Agenda

Many of you have heard Antonin Scalia, Dr. Laura, Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it.

Since they are all so concerned about the "Homosexual Agenda," I thought it might be helpful to have a copy so I asked a friend of mine, who recently obtained a copy of the "Homosexual Agenda" directly from the Head Homosexual, if he would send me a copy. He did and now I am sharing it with all of you. I certainly hope it will assist you so that you will be prepared.

The Homosexual Agenda

6:00 am Gym

8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal, egg whites and mimosas)

9:00 am Hair appointment

10:00 am Shopping (preferably at Nordstrom's or Saks)

12:00 pm Brunch

2:00 pm
(1) assume complete control of the U.S. Federal,state, and local governments, as well as all other forms of world government;
(2) destroy all healthy marriages;
(3) replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents from Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels;
(4) bulldoze all houses of worship;
(5) secure total control of the INTERNET and all mass media;
(6) be fabulous

2:30 pm Mud mask and forty winks of beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles from the stress of world conquest

4:00 pm Cocktails

6:00 pm Light Dinner (soup, salad with romaine, radicchio, arugula, and balsamic vinaigrette dressing, and Pouilly Fuisse)

8:00 pm Theatre

10:30 pm "Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight!"

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