The Militant Libertarian

I'm pissed off and I'm a libertarian. What else you wanna know?

Saturday, July 10, 2004

Turn in your boss: Make big bucks

The German Gestapo had a similar program...

Suspect your company's cheating the IRS out of millions in taxes?
Turn in your boss: Make big bucks

http://goupstate.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20040619/NEWS/406190319
Posted on June 19, 2004, By MARY DALRYMPLE | Associated Press

The proposed IRS Whistleblower Office is designed to give tax agents an inside advantage when fighting tax shelters developed for and used by wealthy taxpayers and corporations. It would go after individuals and corporations with more than $200,000 in income using shelters hiding $20,000 or more.

Informants who blow the whistle stand to win 15% to 30% of the recovered taxes and penalties if they contribute substantially to the case. Those who make lesser contributions can win up to 10%.

The chairman of the Senate Finance Committee, Charles Grassley (R-IA), modeled the office after the False Claims Act, which lets people file lawsuits against companies that defraud the government in arenas other than tax.

©2004 Spartanburg Herald-Journal

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Political Cartoon


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Friday, July 09, 2004

The F Word

When the whole Cheney saying the f-word thing blew up, there was an article in that Sunday's Salt Lake Tribune showing the history in the Congress of various forms of abuse
from one elected official to another: pistol-whipping, canings, fisticuffs, etc.

Getting unhappy because someone said "f**k" to you seems pretty pansy in comparison.

Personally, I'd like to see them go back to having the threat of violence should they really cheese someone off. Might keep some of the morons in line.

Further, were I elected to state or federal legislature, I would propose a bill which would install a small boxing ring with gloves on the House and Senate floors so that those with real contentions can duke it out in front of everyone. It'd be funny to see Orrin Hatch and, say, Hillary Clinton goin' mano-e-mano in the boxing ring...

Just a thought, anyway.

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Thursday, July 08, 2004

Democrat and Republican Belief Systems

Part One - How to be a good Republican
1. You have to believe that AIDS is God's revenge on homosexuals and Africans.

2. You have to believe that it's okay that starting teachers barely make more than minimum wage, because 'those who can, do, those who can't, teach'.

3. You have to believe that U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese & North Korean communists are less of a threat than Saddam Hussein was.

4. You have to believe that there was no entrepreneurship before tax loopholes for corporations.

5. You have to believe that hundreds of respected scientists are wrong about global climate change.

6. You have to believe that patriarchy is right and natural, along with slavery and polygamy, because the Old Testament says so.

7. You have to believe that countries like China, Saudi Arabia, and Russia are good company when it comes to capital punishment, and that back- alley abortion is non-existent.

8. You have to believe that governments may have to oppress in order for businesses to create prosperity.

9. You have to believe that the mining and forestry industries care more about nature than hunters and loony activists.

10. You have to believe that everybody has the self-esteem of rich white privileged males, ignoring the fact that many of them have done nothing to earn it.

11. You have to believe that corrupt politicians who have never served in the military know how to win wars.

12. You have to believe that civil liberties only count when it comes to the second, not the first amendment.

13. You have to believe that bankers are honest and roads pave themselves.

14. You have to mistakenly believe that Lee and Jefferson were Republicans, and be ignorant of the fact that Jefferson and Edison were not Christian.

15. You have to believe that no test writer or employer is racist.

16. You have to have an irrational hatred of Hillary Clinton.

17. You have to believe that citizens of socialist Scandinavia hate the fact that their standard of living is higher than the U.S.

18. You have to believe that lying about getting a BJ from an intern is more offensive than lying about reasons for sending hundreds of Americans and thousands of innocent Iraqis to their deaths.

19. You have to believe that the founding fathers didn't know what they were doing when they wrote the first amendment.

20. You have to believe that the corporate ventures of presidents being funded by Saudi money is somehow in the best interest of the United States.

21. You have to believe that the media is part of a vast, left- wing conspiracy, orchestrated by Hollywood, academia, and the French.


Part Two - How to be a good Democrat
1. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th- graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese & North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and really a very nice person.

17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and sex offender belonged in the White House.

19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese government is somehow in the best interest of the United States.

21. You have to believe that this is email part of a vast, right- wing conspiracy.

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Wednesday, July 07, 2004

2004...


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Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Not-So-Funny


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Notice of Revocation of Independence

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories including New Jersey. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed".

2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf.

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no on else plays "American" football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005.

7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons if they give you any merde. The 98.85% of you who were not aware that there is a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky. The Russians have never been the bad guys. "Merde" is French for "shit".

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 8th will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive Day".

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean.

10. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.

11. Arrest Mel Gibson for treason

12. Enjoy warm flat beer and steak and kidney pudding. Train waitresses to be more aggressive with customers and not to tell you their names before you eat.

13. All members of this British Crown Dependency will be required to take six weeks annual vacation and observe statutory tea breaks.

14. Driving on the left is now compulsory - recall all cars to effect the change immediately.

15. Report to our Consulate General in NY - M Wragg - for your new passport and job allocation.

16. Have Meg Ryan report to the Prince Andrews Bedchamber.

17. Add the Royal insignia to the top of the Washington Monument - and the Queens Christmas speeches to the Lincoln Memorial.

18. Stop referring to the World Series of Baseball and instead call it the National Series of USA, Cuba and Japan.

19. Learn at least the first 4 lines of "God Save The Queen"

20. All national law-enforcement will de-arm and surrender all weapons to the Queens Colony Constabulary and assume operating control under the direction of the Lord High Constable of The American Colonies and its Territories.

21. The American Armed Forces will be reorganized and renamed as Her Majesty's Royal Guard.

Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

From the 'Net at large.

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Sunday, July 04, 2004

Private Space Flight...


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Private Space Flight...


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Private Space Flight...


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