Can't Take A Joke

In today's Capitol Hill Blue is a story titled "Phony Purple Heart Promotion Draws Ire." Apparently, some people don't think that making fake purple hearts and wearing them to "get the chicks" at weddings is all that great. I don't think it's really couth either...but I don't want to make it a federal offense either!!

Here's an excerpt from the article:

Want to land a bridesmaid? Carry a few fake Purple Hearts around and crash a wedding. That's one of many tactics in the movie "Wedding Crashers" used by actors Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson to win over the ladies. But the idea crosses the line for some veterans and members of Congress, who will introduce legislation Friday to make such an act a federal offense.

What most bothers Hershel Gober, former deputy secretary of Veterans Affairs and member of the Military Order of the Purple Heart, about the film so far _ he hasn't seen it yet _ is New Line Cinema's Web site, because it offers fans a "Crasher Kit" complete with a "make your own" Purple Heart.

"Carrying a Purple Heart in your jacket guarantees you attention, admiration and plenty of free booze," the promotion site reads. "To get one of these babies, some dudes have to prove their physical, mental and spiritual strength with great feats of bravery on the battlefield. All you need to do is press the button below."

"It blew my stack," said Gober, who earned a Purple Heart in 1969 in the Mekong Delta when, as an Army company commander, he [was] injured by a booby trap.

"I have no problem with spoofs," he said. "But we're trying to protect the medals."

Oooo! Protect the medals! That's very important! In fact, while we're amending the Constitution to make it illegal to protest by burning a flag, why not ad this on too?? I mean, comon! We're just protecting Old Glory and the Medals!! What a great rallying cry! Constitution, schmonstitution!

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60 Minutes of .50 Caliber Bullshit

So I just finished watching 60 Minutes and their totally unbiased reporting on the .50 Caliber rifle.

By unbiased, I mean that they talked to "experts" on firearms like a former gun-runner for the liberation army (they're on our side, otherwise they'd be called "terrorists") in Kosovo and the former head of the BATFE to get their information.

Of course, no one who wasn't anti-gun was included in the conversations. The reporter went out of his way to ask plenty of leading questions about firearms and to make sure the BATF guy got to talk about "a weapons registry...so we can track these people who make multiple purchases for smuggling and gun-running purposes..." and made sure that the former gun-runner mentioned he was "anti-gun" and was only "taking advantage of a situation" to help the people of his homeland.

Multiple mentions that the .50 can "kill a man from over a mile away" were made. No mention of the fact that several hundred hours of training are required to have that kind of accuracy, of course.

On the up-side, the gun-runner did let it slip that "we have a Second Amendment" and that it allows us to "buy anything our military uses." That's actually a lot of crap...otherwise, our nation would be in a lot better situation than it is in now. Since we don't have access to tanks, planes, heavy machine guns, explosives, and so forth, we are much less of a threat to our law-makers than we would be otherwise.

In saying we could buy what the military uses, though, the gun-runner accidentally hit on the whole purpose of the Second Amendment: to make every man on the street equal to the man in the military so that the military (and the government which controls it) is unable to subjugate the people.

Too bad there isn't an amendment in the Bill of Rights about not allowing the media to be controlled, not allowing mass mind-control through public education, and so forth. Oh well. I guess we take what we can get...for now.

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